‘Robert Huth’s Unnecessary Punching 2010’ Featuring Your Favourite Footy Fights, (Possibly) Available Before Christmas On All Good Consoles

PhotobucketRobert Huth caused a commotion on the weekend when he inexplicably smacked West Ham’s Matthew Upson in the face. Always eager to cash in, particularly with the christmas period fast approaching, your man Shilts has come up with a belter of a stocking filler;

Robert Huth’s Unnecessary Punching 2010 available on all good consoles. (Xbox 360, PS3, SEGA Megadrive) Release date TBA.

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Play as Stoke’s lumbering German centre back and relive the priceless moment as you amble into your own area and then punch Matthew Upson right in the face for absolutely no reason whatsoever!

Also featuring other classic unnecessary football fights with a host of playable characters:

  • Harness Eric Cantona’s awesome kung fu skills as you boot a Crystal Palace fan in the face!
  • Learn to weild a golf club properly as you smash John Arne Riise into a bloody pulp as Craig Bellamy!
  • Ruin France’s World Cup ’82 as Germany goalkeeper Harald Schumacher by running out miles and clotheslining Patrice Battison!

On top of that there are a host of multiplayer match ups to contest with your mates:

  • Decide who wins in the Teammate Tussle game mode featuring Keiron Dyer vs Lee Bowyer, Freddie Ljungberg vs Olof Mellberg and Jason Lee vs a football.
  • Either choose to hammer Marco Materazzi into the floor with your head as Zidane or play as the Italian and throw a insults at the French maestro like “you’re lame Zidane!” or “you’re not very good at football!” or “your mum smells!” or “I’m gonna burn down your house with you famiy trapped inside then laugh manically as I hoover up their charred remains and then feed them to my cat and then wait till he shits them out and then I’m gonna throw them at you!”

Shilts then got Perez Shilton’s resident games oracle, Jamie Redknapp, to review the game:

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“It is wel gd cos u get 2 b a man wot does fightin an damage 2 ova ppl an all kinds o shit lyk tht. i partiqularily enjoied it when i got 2 smash my dad harry in teh face repeatedly wen playin as teh police in the mishun where u raid his house n take him 2 court 4 dodgy transfer dealins lol. but then dad came an turned it off an told me 2 go 2 bed but i ws lyk nah dad i am a big boi now who does his own decisions an so i askd me missus louis 2 help me out but she sed ‘go to bed’ so i wnt 2 bed.

overal teh grafics are sadly lackin as most of teh tym it was just an picture wot shilts drew and placed in front of me but i was stil entertrained for 4 mayb 7 hours at a tym so i give it 9 out of 10. top game-aceing!!”

Follow Shilts on Twitter

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